Lap the Lakes 2017 - They are Back, Baby!

I have been fairly happy with the my results in the cycling events that I have ridden in 20187.

[REVISION September 29, 2017: It has been brought to my attention, that I have not idea what year it is. I told you that I was a little out of it that day, and obviously it continued on for a few days after. Relax, it is only 2017, or did I just come back from the future and give you an update of what will happen? Only I know the truth.]

Land Run 100: wet, cold muddy, I finished and had a great time playing in the mud.

The EPIC (80): turned out to be a crazy day of pouring rain, hail, lightening, micro-bursts, and flooding that caused us to call the race, only 40ish miles in.

Dirty Kanza 200: I had a great day on the bike and beat my previous best time by over 2 hours.

24hrs of Cumming (65): I had a good ride on my leg of the relay, even though my crank arm fell off with 5 miles to go, and I had to jog/walk/coast my way in.

Pony Express Gravel Dash (75): had another fairly good day, some cramping, but ended with a top 20 finish.

The common theme in all of these is that I have been able to keep the cramping to a minimum, and managed to keep my legs from complete lockup. I have changed my nutrition (on the bike), and made some progress. I also had a positive attitude while riding. I just might have this cramping thing figured out…

Then came Lap the Lakes on September 23, 2017. This year I signed up for the 120ish mile course. I must admit, I was not all that excited about tackling that distance, but I signed up, and I was not going to wimp out.

As the day got closer, the predicted temperature kept creeping up, from the low 80s to the upper 80s. It had me worried. I think I fear the heat more than anything when I ride. I stopped by the bike shop on Friday, and was expressing my concerns about the impending heat wave, and somehow the conversation turned to quitting during a ride. Both Adam and Ryan said, “John won’t quit, he never quits.” I was honored that they would say such a thing, and I assured them that I would not quit. That is not an option.

Saturday morning came, and I rode my bike to the starting line, loaded down with 5 water bottles, even though there were checkpoints about every 30 miles. It was going to be hot, and I was not going to run out of water. Waiting for the race to start, I was still not too excited that I had signed up for the longer distance.

Finally, we took off, and the first leg went very well. I was keeping a strong pace, but not exerting too much energy. I rolled into checkpoint one, right on schedule with my hydration and nutrition. I only took about 2 minutes at the checkpoint, then got out and kept moving forward, and with a bonus of 2 chocolate chip cookies. Score!

As we started the second leg, we headed south, and had to push a head/cross wind almost the entire leg. My pace was dropping, but I was moving forward, and that is what counts.

As I approached Reading, KS, I had lost sight of all other riders, and I made my first mistake. I turned left on the highway into town. About a half mile down the road, my Garmin showed that I was off course. Damn. I ended up zig-zagging my way back to road Y and the highway, where I had made the wrong turn. My Garmin never did find the course for the rest of leg 2. I pulled out the cue sheets and figured out that I should have kept going straight on Y across the highway, so I headed south on Y again.

Mistake number 2, I did not turn left on Front St. Instead, I kept going South on Y. After about a mile, I realized my mistake, and by this time, I was getting very frustrated. I made my way back to Front St., turned East, and then went in circles in Reading for a while, getting more pissed off by the second. Finally, I made my way out of Reading and thought I may be back on course, but was not sure. I missed a couple of more turns, and was starting to really doubt my navigating abilities without my Garmin. It was still screaming at me that I was off course.

I do not have a cue sheet holder (but I will be buying one soon), and as I was sitting up riding, only holding onto the handle bar slightly with one hand, trying to unfold my cue sheet with the other, suddenly I hit a large pot hole, and came very close to wiping out. Swear words were flying, and my attitude was quickly going the wrong direction.

I had not seen another rider for over an hour, when finally, Shawn O’Mara rode up and I asked him if he was lost too. Luckily he was not, so I was on course. Looks like it would be cue sheets from here on out. If only I could stay within sight of Shawn, I would be golden, because that guy knows how to navigate. You can guess how that worked out for me. Lost sight of him in just a few minutes.

The final miles into CP2 were long and painful. Cramps started at mile 45. Just back off some. Passed by a rider. Cramps hitting in multiple locations of both legs. Back off more. Cramps in neck and arms and hands. Passed by more riders. Can’t back off too much more or I will not be moving. Walking hills that I should easily be riding at 14mph or more. Creeping along at 7mph on the flats. More riders go by. Just make the call. No, you don’t quit. Just make it to the checkpoint and then quit. No, just need a better attitude. Back off. The cramps will go away. Just give them time. Next hill, walking, quitting at CP2. Going into CP2, there were a few fairly large hills, going down. I will never be able to climb back out. Time to quit.

As I came into CP2, my wife Lisa was there, ready to restock me and get me back out on the road. I said, no, I AM DONE! She said, “no you are not. You will be fine.” I was getting ready to sit down in a chair and she said, “don’t sit down” (I have told her not to let me sit down at a checkpoint). I sat down anyway. Gary and Katie Bacon were trying to cheer me up as well, but I was not cooperating. I was having this massive argument with myself. I don’t want to ride anymore. I hate the heat. The cramping is too much. BUT, I don’t want to quit. Suck it up. Get a better attitude and it will be fine. Just keep moving forward.

Finally, I decided to get my fat ass on the bike and keep riding. As I pulled away, I told my wife to keep her phone on because I was sure I would need a ride soon. First hill out of CP2, I started to turn around and just quit. Kept moving forward. As I came close to the end of the pavement section, I missed the turn back onto gravel. Please, please, please, let Lisa come up behind me now in the car. That would be a sign to just quit. I looked, she was not there. I turned around and started down the gravel. Not 25 yards down the road, I dropped my cue sheets, and they started to blow away. “FUCK!” I laid my bike down, in the middle of the road, and waddled (believe me, it was much more like a waddle than a walk) to get my cues sheets. As I made it back to my bike, I decided that this was useless, and I turned around, and rode back to the pavement to wait for Lisa to come along and get me. “FUCK, FUCK, FUCK, FUCK, FUCK!!!!!” I turned back around and headed south again on the gravel. “Now, you have made your decision, so fucking stick to it” I told myself.

I put in some more miles, cramping getting worse each hill. Cussed a lot. Tried to convince myself to stop being such an asshole and just ride. I reached a long, paved section heading south towards Waverly. Along the flat, I was only able to average around 7mph, and a big hill was coming up. A rider passed me. My legs were screaming, my arms cramping, neck and back killing me, and it was freaking hot. Before I got to the hill, there was some shade right up next to the edge of the road, and I had to stop. I was dizzy and could hardly stand up. I sat/fell down, and it was over. I made the call.

Then the cramps really hit. I am talking, holly shit, my calf should not be shaped like that! It is a good thing no one was around, because they would have learned some new words. Unable to move, I laid on the side of the road, and tried to relax. A few cars drove passed me. They didn’t stop. I was a little surprised, because I looked like a dead guy on the side of the road. Perhaps I looked bloated, and they thought I would stink too much. I still had to make it to Old Highway 50, where I told Lisa to pick me up at. Finally, I limped my way there, and about 30 minutes after the call, my ride arrived.

I know it was the right decision to make. It was just not my day. I thought I had solved the severe cramping issues, but obviously I still have some work to do. The heat is still my enemy, but next time…next time I will handle it better.

The next day, as I am taking the bike rack off of my Jeep, it hits me. Now I know exactly what happened. This is why I had such a bad day on the bike. When I put the bike rack on Friday, I put the pin in backwards. You see, I always put the pin in the receiver from the left to the right, with the lock on the right side. BUT, on Friday, I put the pin in backwards, and the lock was on the left side. When I did it, I told myself to turn it around, but I didn’t. That’s just stupid. It makes no difference. But it does make a difference! That’s why I had so many cramping issues on Saturday. Now it makes total sense.

My wife thinks I have a screw loose.

I am sure it had nothing to do with my attitude, the heat, fitness level, eating habits, hydration, or other logical things. It all came down to the pin.

I guess I won’t do that again.

NOTE: I don’t want people to take this post the wrong way. I am not looking for sympathy. I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. Each of us has our own challenges, and mine just happens to be cramping (and possibly a little craziness in my head). I simply write this stuff down because I am fascinated by the thoughts that go on in my head when I take on challenges like this. I really wish I had video of me losing it after CP2. I have tried to be as accurate and write down the events that happened to me that day so that someday, I can come back and relive the moment, and have a little laugh.